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Brothers, tea and Transformers

  • Jun. 26th, 2009 at 10:47 AM
trollmann på tbanen
Yesterday I got a phonecall from my brother who is in Germany visiting some friends. It was really great to hear from him and it was grand to hear that he was having a good time. By the sound of it they were well into the cans of beer and I distinctly heard a mention of Chivaz Regal. Those mangy bastards....

Anyway, I think I have looked forward to my brother going more or less as much as he has these past few weeks, mostly because I know some stuff about their plans for him and I know he's gonna love it. It is also good that he got to go somewhere else and do something completely different and when he called yesterday I was so happy to hear from him that I wasn't sure what to do with myself after. Sounds odd perhaps, but when people I care a lot about are happy or reach goals I become insanely happy for them. Much more than I am when I reach my own goals actually.

He's gonna be seeing a concert tonight so I am assuming that my phone will ring at silly o'clock tonight when he's become properly drunk and feel an urgent need to tell me about the night. I always leave my phone on when I know my brothers are off somewhere getting drunk because they both tend to call when they're ready to go home and need someone to jabber with/at while they sober up. I have two great brothers and I love them very much and when one of them is off enjoying himself as much as my oldest brother did yesterday I can do nothing but grin cheesily all day.

Apart from that, I am just damn glad it's Friday. Starting work again really just reminded me of how swell weekends really are. Not that work is hard/hectic/stressful/pegged for hate - but loving weekends tend to come with having a weekday job anyway. Transformers 2 have yet to find it's way to cinemas around here, I am not very pleased by that.

Also, we're out of tea and I feel very much disturbed.

Pokerface

  • Jun. 9th, 2009 at 9:22 PM
bakende

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLvkq4SeAxI</lj-embed>


I'm not always fond of coversongs, but this one caught my ear quite soundly. I must admit to having turned the volume of my speakers up to ungodly desibels as I was sorting through a lot of old University stuff this afternoon. I have been pretty much a slacker when it comes to school books and handouts that I no longer need and have managed to stash around three year's worth in boxes. No wonder my mother was going a bit crazy. Today I took them out and started sorting through, and now several hours later I have rid myself of enough paper to make one massive Midsummer's bonfire.

While sorting through my books I found one in partcular that made me snicker slightly from my first year of University;


The conditions of social science;
A study of the social philosophy of the social sciences.


I kept that one so I have something to scare my future students with.

Dear Sam

  • May. 26th, 2009 at 5:15 PM
for sam
Today you're 21. Happy birthday!
I've been thinking a lot about you today. I've been hearing your voice in my head in a non-creepy kind of way and wishing you were still around. It is not fair that you had to go so soon. It's even more unfair that I didn't really get to tell you how much I appreciated your random weirdness and acts of strange hilarity. It brightened up many days. I still don't quite know how I'll get through long, boring days at work without your e-mails to hang onto. You really made many of my days there good ones and I am really going to miss it this summer. You had a lot of nice hopes and dreams. You were so smart, so kind and caring and funny too. That's a lot of good things, and it made a wonderful person. I wish I could get a chance to tell you that, to let you know how great you were and how well I thought of you. But I hope you knew anyway Samlad.

Happy birthday.

Summer is here

  • May. 25th, 2009 at 10:56 AM
smoking pirate
So, summer is here now and I have had a few very hectic weeks what with exams and whatnot. It's still a bit weird thinking that I am on summer break, feels a bit too unreal and 'no way' like. Might be because they have made sure to keep me busy in my days off before I start working so I have a long list of stuff I need to do. I don't mind really, days get very boring unless you have something to fill them with.
Yesterday was good. We had a massive family dinner that me and mum had spend a lot of Saturday preparing for. I think I might still be full from it . My aunt and uncle came over, my favourite pair that be. We don't have a huge family and I only really have two pairs of aunt and uncles outside of just the close family and we don't see each other very often. Which is why yesterday was so nice, even though doing the dishes afterwards was a lot of work. We are a rather traditional bunch, the women take care of the dishes after the meal. I don't really mind that, having been raised with that I just feel like a lazy bum unless I get up to help.

I'm looking very forward to summer. Am getting a visit from a few very good friends of mine whom I visited last year (theceri.livejournal.com/40186.html) and had a great time with. Helen and Lou will visit me for a week in July and I am sure it will be awesome and I look very much forward to show them about . Sleep deprivation and Disney-marathons will follow I have no doubt. It's gonna be great. Considering how I won't be able to go anywhere this summer myself due to work it's really wonderful to have something to look forward to in a visit from good friends.

Apart from that I am doing a countdown until Transformers - Revenge of The Fallen comes to the cinemas. I was in a great big fan-fog before the first one and I bet it will be no different this time.


 

Status report

  • Apr. 13th, 2009 at 11:57 AM
odin
Well, Easter is pretty much over for this year, and I had some goals I was gonna reach over those days that people spend eating chocolate until they feel sick. I have yet to eat chocolate this Easter actually...
Anyways, I had this little reading list I was going to take care of, and for my own sake I should make a status report on that, if nothing else to show myself what a useless piece of human machinery I am.

  • Huckleberry Finn X (but partly not my fault - I did not get a hold of the book)
  • Who`s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? V
  • Heart of Darkness - in progress (EDIT: 17/4 - 09 - Finished!)
  • the damned grammar X - but I have high hopes for tomorrow.
Huckleberry Finn needs to be read, I assume a great possibility for it to show up for the final exam in May. Which means I am running a bit out of time here. Am feeling a wee bit panicky about that. Or at least I will in a relative short amount of time unless I get a hold of the book. Hmpf.
I finished Who`s Afraid of Virginia Woolf but it wasn't really a huge effort. For starters it is a play, and secondly its not even a very huge play. But disturbing in its own way. Certainly not something to read/watch for someone who is going about thinking about getting married or someone who will be married shortly. The way humans can torture each other is horrible sometimes. Talk about private hell.
I started Heart of Darkness yesterday, it's a piece of about 50 pages in my anthology of English literature. All in all not something that should be too difficult to read. The anthology isn't the best book to read from however. It's quite massive and heavy with very thin pages - kind of like in a Bible - and the text is crammed together on every page. You get tired of it. Not to mention it is a damned heavy book to haul around to read in when you get an opportunity. But oh well. Some things you have to deal with as a student.
As far as the damned grammar goes, the opportunity did not really present itself, and I take some self criticism for that. Its not like this will be any easier if I don't sit down on my own with it to read. Need to get a grip there. Silly student!



First half of Easter break

  • Apr. 8th, 2009 at 4:26 PM
starry hut
I`ve just gotten back home from spending some days up in the mountains at our cabin along with my dad. It was good to get away from home for a bit and get a change of air. I`ll admit to being apprehensive at the beginning though. We started sharing the place with another family (the son of the man we bought the place from and his family) and I haven`t been there since before that. I was sort of scared that it wouldn`t feel like our cabin anymore. There were things thwt weren`t ours there now and some changes, but all in all the place still felt like the one I had left a few years previously.

Me and dad went on the ice the first day to attend an annual ice-fishing contest. We weren`t presicely in luck, but the contest didn`t start until 11 o`clock and if you want to catch fish you have to be there much, much earlier. But it is tradition. And usually quite pleasant if the weather is nice. You can sit and enjoy the sun or talk to friends you only meet at those occasions for instance. e


And the scenery isnt bad either.


We drove to our cabin after that. It lies a good walk into the woods, and this late in winter it can be quite a challenge to get down there, because when you are loaded with luggage you sink thigh-deep into the snow for every step, and sometimes you even get stuck. With a pleasant mood and some patience it isnt much of a challenge though. (On a random note, am now listening to some metal and realised that apart from a shower that is the only thing I have really missed up there.)

  

To the right is our cabin complete with my dad in front of it, and to the left is the shed where we have the firewood and our fashionable toilet. Its a very nice place, quiet and quite lovely when the weather is proper. If the weather is crap you go inside and light a fire and play cards or something of the sort. We have actually gotten a small TV with a DVD player to it now (revolusionary!) so we can watch films when the night sets in.




Just for fun, here is a picture of traditional footwear in the Norwegian mountain regions. Theese are called lobber and are very warm and comfortable to wear inside and/or outside.

Tuesday morning I went ice-fishing (properly) with my dad. Now, proper ice-fishing includes getting up at 4-5 AM and dress very warmly and fill your thermos with whatever keeps you warm, get some breakfast down and pull your pack on your back and leave long before the sun even contemplates rising. Me and dad were wandering out on the ice just as it started getting light outside and we could see the eastern horizon get faintly pink. It is quite beautiful when you combine it with the magnificent nature, the fresh cold air and the silence. That alone is an experience that I fail to describe in words.



It was cold at first (though walking out there kept us warm) but thankfully there was no wind, and that makes everything much easier. Temperature itself isn`t so bad, it`s the wind that gets to you. Wind can make a couple negative degrees feel ten times worse than it would without it. But it wasn`t too cold that morning, and no wind - so all in all it was very beautiful. We started fishing somewhere between 6:30 and 6:45 AM and the first fish bit just before 7. I got it! I can`t describe the feeling you get when you feel the fish biting and hangs at the end of the line and pulling it up, hoping it won`t drop. And the feeling of success as you pull it up. And it tastes wonderful too. Just for the record.

 

Easter in the mountains is supposed to be a very enjoyable affair, and it really is if weather is on your side. There are few things in this world more likeable than sitting in the sun reading something and feel that the warmth of spring really is setting in. Ideally that is what you want to do when you come back from ice-fishing for 6-7 hours. You want to take a cold beer or something else nice out with you, sit down at your favourite spot, read a newspaper or a book or a Donald pocket in the sun and just enjoy being lazy. Me and dad did this, but the wind made it much less enjoyable than what it usually is. I shall demonstrate thus:



Okay. It was just a bit chilly with all the wind.

But it was still great to be there for a while and remember things from when I was a little kid and take life just as it came and not have to think or worry much about the things outside the little world one creates for oneself when you`re away from your everyday life. I feel quite rejuvenated, but at the same time I admit it will be nice not having to boil the water over a fire every time I want to wash my hands or face in warm water.



Easter

  • Apr. 3rd, 2009 at 3:35 PM
Dirt

I start my Easter-break today, and whereas I am sure it will be pleasant and whatnot to not have Uni to attend (means far less sunrises for me to behold) it will be most odd coming back and knowing it is merely a few weeks left of lectures/seminars before final exams. I have enjoyed this year so much that I dont really want to finish just yet. I have also been very lucky with classmates and such this year, which is a firts for me since starting Uni. It will be sort of sad to not see them every day again when summer comes. I have things in need doing over the break also, so this whole “break” thing is really a topic for discussion.

I have a couple things I should/need/have-to-or-you`re-dead read before the break is over, not to mention that Grammar and Phonetics have taken on a whole new dimension if incomprehensible the last week, and if I want to have a chance of pulling myself through the final exam without bringing paramedics with me I have to sit down with it.  Does sound like a splendid vacation…reading grammar…
On the upside. That is one thing I wont miss from this year once it is over with! I will miss the teachers we`ve had in that subject though. They are awesome, and its not their fault that I simply cannot like their subjects.

So, reading list for Easter:

  • Huckleberry Finn
  • Who`s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?
  • Heart of Darkness
  • the damned grammar

Its not too bad. Number two and three are fairly short texts, and Huckleberry Finn is a fairly easy read. At least compared to a couple of the eposes we`ve had to go through this year (1984, Jane Eyre, The Great Gatsby, The Scarlet Letter, Hamlet, The God of Small Things and on and on - don`t get me started on the poetry).
Still hoping to fit some completely ego-times into it as well. Parents go off to the mountains for a few days at least, so I do intend to pull a Die Hard marathon with lazy-bum food and beer to go with it. And move furniture with my loudspeakers.


nemis drage
Midterms are just around the corner and that is something I find completely preposterous. I have certainly not been back at University long enough for it already to be time for midterms. One of them is oral this semester though, and I kind of look forward to that. Most people do better in oral examinations - only provided that they have actually studied of course. If you haven`t I suspect an oral exam to be kinda like torture and an introduction to how it feels when your body seemingly looses the ability to control its temperature.
I am not awfully worried, but a tad nervous nonetheless. We have some new teachers this semester, and I have really no clue about what sort of assignments they would be likely to spawn for a midterm examination - though given the fact that one of them seem to adore William Wordsworth beyond reasoning I think I should at least make sure to be brushed up within that subject at the very least.

Today I am also going back to work for the first time in quite a few months. They haven`t had a use of me in a long time, but now they apparently do. I`m pretty sure I have forgotten some 80% of what I could when I worked there every day, but hopefully the basics should return to me within about an hour. It`s all about remembering codes mostly and which one to use for what. Hopefully the real demanding, tricky people will have better things to do today. Like shovel their driveways and other such things.

Freedom soon....hang in there!

  • Dec. 12th, 2008 at 11:31 PM
wake the dead
One week! Just oooooone week to go until I`m free(er)! Just one bloody final to go and then I`m done. To make up for it, that final is on my birthday. So I will be bringing a muffin, a lighter and a birthday candle to light up when I feel like lunching during exam in silent defiance of spending my 21st writing philosophy.
Apart from that, I don`t dread this final too much, it`s an interesting subject (most of the time) and I enjoyed the lectures we had, so almost sad to be finished with it in fact, hopefully we will get decent exercises on the day as well. I got lucky when I sat my final in science history and got two assignments I`d love to do and could only choose one. Now that is a problem of luxury if I ever saw one. I`m gunning for another one next Friday (pretty please!). Apart from that Christmas is slowly sneaking it`s festive spirit upon the household. Due to a financial crisis in my wallet I`ve been selling my slave labours around and I`ve just snapped out of a three-day baking spree for mum. Thankfully nothing got burnt down. Mission accomplished.

Also, winter seems to actually have a solid grasp on the world up here this time, and I am thrilled to say the least. There is something undeniably dismal about a Christmas without snow at least if you`re used to having it cold and snowy (like I am). A grey, rainy Christmas is likely to get me very glum indeed, but with some luck that won`t be an issue this year. Have spent an evening in utter lazyness, watching National Treasure, am about to start watching National Treasure II - Book of Secrets. Tomorrow will be spent at the library preparing for already mentioned final. And enjoying my last weekend as a 20-year old. Not that I believe next weekend will be that much different - it will just involve cake!

   

To dream of orange skies

  • Nov. 23rd, 2008 at 10:51 AM
holding back the flood
So, today I got to see Sam`s memorial movie, and it had pretty much the effect I had expected it would have. His open sincerity always touched me, and I have no doubt it will continue to do just that whenever I`m faced with it. I reckognised much from conversations we have had before, maybe that`s part of the reason it struck me so. I remember we had a conversation about being remembered after you`re gone, and how be both agreed that we wouldn`t want to be remembered history-book style. That being remembered for the lifetime of those who knew you, and only in small moments every once in a while was far better than never being forgotten. Especially if the memories you leave behind are fond ones.

My memories of Sam are definetly fond, and though there will probably be times I don`t think of him as often I can never forget him for he gave me so much to remember him by.

A week

  • Nov. 6th, 2008 at 6:51 PM
Dirt


It has been a strange week, it has been strange even if nothing out of the ordinary has occured the past seven days. I`ve done pretty much everything I usually do over the course of a week, but it has still been odd. Perhaps because I`ve spent much of it thinking "this time yesterday/two days ago/five days ago/last week" I did so-and-so. I know for a fact that tomorrow I will think "this time last week I was running as fast as I could down at the gym, trying to forget the day before, failing miserably."

I have just been very aware of the passage of time, and I know why. Sam`s been on my mind, one way or another all week. Sometimes he`s been right in front in a way that made me unable to think or do anything else at the time, and other times just in the back of my mind someplace, but always there. A lot of things have been reminding me of him. Down at my mother`s shop we have two fluffy llamas, can`t look at them anymore without feeling a sad sort of smile creep over my face. My favourite t-shirt has a text on it that he`s directly responsible for sending my way - the songs he sent me are all nicely organised in a file, as are all the e-mails from him that I`ve been re-reading.

I`m not crying as badly as I did the first two days anymore, perhaps because I`ve had to accept the fact that he`s not gonna attack me out of nowhere with random anymore, perhaps it`s because I`ve cried the amount I`m capable of already. But perhaps mostly because I know very well what he would have told me if he could. He`d say something along the lines of not wanting Laila-lady to cry because that`d make him sad, and that he`d much rather have me chuckle at his silly stuff and be merry. By this point he would have gone past his quota of serious for a day and made a joke to try to make me laugh. He would probably have succeeded too.

Sam

  • Nov. 2nd, 2008 at 11:55 AM
for sam
Thursday evening I came home to an e-mail from the parents of a very good friend of mine. He had passed away that night, due to sudden heart failiure, sleeping peacefully in his own bed. It was probably just like going to sleep without waking up again.

Sam suffered from MD, so we all knew that there was a chance he would be gone sooner than any of us wished for, but it still came as a complete shock to read that message, and I read it over and over, not wanting to believe it - just hoping it was all a cruel joke. But you don`t joke about stuff like that.

I know how people, when they loose someone unexpectedly, suddenly finds out how short life really is, and they start talking about it in a way suggesting they had never thought of it before. I understand what they mean now. Sam was only 20 years old, he had still a lot of things to give to life, none of us were prepared to loose him just yet -  and suddenly he`s gone, taking his wonderful, winning character with him. Life is short, and I sit behind wishing I had let him know how much I cared about him more often than I did. It`s not that I think he wasn`t aware of how much he meant to me - but there were times I could have told him but didn`t. And now I can`t.
It has showed me its important to let people know how much they mean to you, even if they are perfectly healthy and likely to live to ripe old age, because you never know if they will. What if suddenly something happens, and all the things you were going to tell them one day was left unsaid because you thought you had all the time in the world? What if someone dies never knowing how much you cared?

Sam wasn't afraid to love people, he wasn't afraid to shower them with affection and random acts of immense kindness. Life hadn't corrupted him enough for him to prefer to keep people guessing at his feelings. If he had thought about me every day for a week he told me so and if there was some picture I looked beautiful in - I was told. He never let me doubt for even a second that I was an important person in his life, and I loved him all the more for it. And I hope, I hope so intensely that he also knew how much he meant to me, even if there were times I did not say so.

Live like you mean it and love til you feel it. Sam lived by that and I can`t imagine that anyone who was touched by his care, thoughtfulness, kindness and affection won`t feel like there is something missing now that he is gone.

Sam was a wonderful friend, with a heartwarming, winning way about him. He was witty and beyond kind, to put a smile on the face of everyone he met seemed to be one of his greatest goals in life sometimes. He was sincere in a way that few other people are. I remember that especially well, because once we talked about crushing on people. We all know how that feels, if someone tries to prod us into talking about that person we feel our face heat up and an intense urge to brush it off as someone you don`t "think about like that.".
Sam didn't do that. He said that talking about it made him feel giddy and tingly and that his face was warm.
I will miss his sincerity, I will miss the way he always tried to crack me up with silly stuff if I felt a bit glum. I`m gonna miss seeing e-mails drop into my inbox on crappy days. I`m gonna miss listening to him talk about all kinds of silly in audio-chats. I will miss comparing University professors. I will miss how he always teased me after I finished midterms with great results about how I had refused to believe him when he assured me I would be fine. I`m going to miss, how he every day I knew him made me feel special just through the knowledge that he was out there in the world and caring about me.

He hardly ever complained about the disease he had to live with, it seemed like the only problems it caused him was the occasional aches and pains from having to be static all day long. Just a very few times did he let me see that it actually bothered him for more than that. Despite the things he had to live with, he could always listen to trifles of everyday problems and see you through whatever bothered you. And he did it in a way that never made you feel awkward of talking to him about superficial problems. Sam was unique, kind and wonderful, he was witty, smart and affectionate and it really feels like I have lost something special in my life, one of the best friends I have ever had.

I am going to miss you Sam, and I hope you never doubted how much I always cared about you.
And I did do well on those midterms - but you knew that already, you always had faith in me.

Motstøy 2008

  • Oct. 12th, 2008 at 12:07 PM
Dirt
So, I have been to Motstøy. It is an annual festival that has been around since 2005. It has been formed mainly due to initial hard work by four individuals and a kabunch of volunteers. They have a solid lineup and a really swell arrangement that is even alcohol free in order to have a free age-limit. This year was my first year going, and I already look forward to next year if they will manage to keep it up. I will definetly show up if they do.

Of course, my neck is aching, my ears are ringing, my voice is non-existant and I am more than partially deaf, but it is all how you are supposed to feel after two nights of metal. If you dont feel like that something about the concert wasnt right. Must admit to a certain degree of scepsism though. Whereas I really do love the metal, going to a concert isnt like going to a Simon & Garfunkel thing. You have mosh pits to stay away from, and you must accept that private space is a non-existant matter. I was lucky enough to get a very good place though (mostly because I showed up really early.) and thankfully could stand right in front and not have to worry about anything in front of me.

I got to see Finntroll, Satyricon, Antidepressive Delivery, Flower Kings and Gorgoroth live during theese couple of days, since I wasnt feeling very well I chose not to see every concert there was, but I still got a decent dose of what it had to offer. Finntroll and Satyricon was by far the most fangasmic experience. Gorgoroth have been well-known for too long I think. They have gotten that famous-band habit of showing up half an hour late. And they quit 20-15 minutes before they were going to because apparently the sound wasnt well enough. I didnt see anyone in the audience suffering from that. But oh well. Then I know what band I will not see live again.

Next project will be to attempt to talk my brother into coming with me to Oslo the 1st of November to see Pagans Mind and Sonata Arctica together with an australian band I haven`t heard of before. I need the big lad to come with me and look after me. Oslo is quite much bigger than Notodden.
Anyway, I got some pictures taken! They are not awesome, because it is quite hard to take pictures of stuff that won`t stand still in strong spotlights, and it was a bit crampled where I was standing, so I was afraid to get bumped into so I would drop my camera on the floor. In which case I would not see it again I`m sure. I saw a phone skidding across the floor at one point, I`m pretty sure I was the last person to see it in one piece.

 
          Its my shadow!                                                                                He even looked at me for this one!

 
Satyricon                                                                                                            More of Satyricon. Hardcore guitar/bass work!


The Flower Kings                                                                                                                                                   Gorgoroth


Gorgoroth

All in all, pretty decent weekend I had this time over, and
even if a few screws and stuff probably rattles loosely about in my head right now, it was well worth it! METAL!!

I also do what Helen says..

  • Oct. 8th, 2008 at 6:32 PM
harlequin jack
...even if its just indirectly!

➜ Bold the ones that are true.
➜ Italicize the ones that are sort of true.

General
I am 5'4 or shorter.
ღ I think I'm ugly.
I have many scars. (You all want to sit around a campfire and listen to my stories. You knows it!)
ღ I tan easily.
ღ I wish my hair was a different colour.
I have friends who have never seen my natural hair colour.
ღ I have a tattoo.
ღ I am self-conscious about my appearance.
I have/had braces.
I wear glasses. (Not that I let you people see it..)
ღ I'd get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free, scar-free.
ღ I've been told I'm attractive by a complete stranger.
I have had more than two piercings.
ღ I have had piercings in places besides my ears.
ღ I have freckles.

Family/home life
ღ I've sworn at my parents.
I've run away from home.
ღ I've been kicked out of the house.
My biological parents are still together.
ღ I have a sibling less than one year old.
I want to have kids some day. (Giving room for the fact that my biological clock will kick in one day)
ღ I have children.
ღ I've lost a child.

Embarrassment
ღ I've slipped out a "lol" in a spoken conversation.
ღ Disney movies still make me cry. Shut up.
I've snorted while laughing. (Its part of my charm...totally..)
I've laughed so hard I've cried.
I've glued my hand to something.
ღ I've laughed till some kind of beverage came out of my nose.
ღ I've had my trousers rip in public.

Health
I've had stitches.
I've broken a bone.
ღ I've had my tonsils removed.
ღ I've sat in a doctor's office with a friend.
ღ I've had my wisdom teeth removed.
ღ I've had serious surgery.
ღ I've had chicken pox.

Traveling
I've driven over 200 miles (1000km) in one day.
I've been on a plane.
ღ I've been to North America.
ღ I've been to Niagara Falls.
ღ I've been to Japan.
I've been to Europe.
ღ I've been to Africa.

Experiences
ღ I've been lost in my city.
I've seen a shooting star.
I've wished on a shooting star.
ღ I've seen a meteor shower.
I've gone out in public in my pajamas.
ღ I've pushed all the buttons in a lift.
ღ I've been to a casino.
ღ I've been skydiving.
ღ I've gone skinny dipping.
I've played spin the bottle.
ღ I've crashed a car.
I've been skiing.
I've been in a play.
I've met someone in person from the internet.
I've caught a snowflake on my tongue.
I've seen the northern lights.
I've sat on a roof top at night.
ღ I've played chicken.
ღ I've seen the RHPS.
ღ I've eaten sushi.
ღ I've been snowboarding.

Relationships
I'm single.
ღ I'm in a relationship.
I'm available.
ღ I'm engaged.
ღ I'm married.
ღ I've gone on a blind date.
I've been the dumpee more than the dumper.
ღ I have a fear of abandonment.
ღ I've been divorced.
I've had feelings for someone who didn't have them back.
ღ I've told someone I loved them when I didn't.
ღ I've told someone I didn't love them when I did.
ღ I've kept something from a past relationship.

Sexuality
ღ I've had a crush on someone of the same gender.
ღ I've kissed a member of the same gender.
ღ I've had sex with someone of the opposite gender.
ღ I've had sex with someone of the same gender.
ღ I've had sex with more than one person at the same time.
I am a cuddler.
I've been kissed in the rain.
ღ I've had sex outdoors.
I've hugged a stranger.
I have kissed a stranger.
ღ I have had sex with a stranger.

Honesty/crime
ღ I've done something I promised someone else I wouldn't.
ღ I have lied to my parents about where I am.
I am keeping a secret from the world.
I've cheated while playing a video game.
I've cheated on a test.
ღ I've driven through a red light.
ღ I've been suspended from school.
ღ I've witnessed a crime.
I've been in a fist fight.
ღ I've been arrested.
ღ I've shoplifted.

Drugs/alcohol
I've consumed alcohol.
ღ I have/do smoked cigarettes.
ღ I have/do smoked pot.
I regularly drink. (Getting there..)
ღ I've taken painkillers when I didn't need them.
ღ I take cough medication when I'm not sick.
ღ I've done hard drugs.
ღ I've been addicted to an illegal substance.
ღ I can't swallow pills.
ღ I can swallow about five pills at a time no problem.

Random
I can sing well.
ღ I've stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
ღ I open up to others too easily.
I watch the news.
I don't kill bugs. (Leave the spiders be! They mean luck you ignorants!)
ღ I hate hearing songs that sacrifice meaning for sake of being able to rhyme.
ღ I fucking swear regularly.
I sing in the shower. (Shamelessly so..)
I am a morning person.
ღ I paid for my mobile phone ring tone.
I'm a snob about grammar.
ღ I am a sports fanatic.
ღ I play with my hair.
ღ I have/had "x"s in my screen name.
ღ I love being neat. (In certain things neatness is a big plus.)
ღ I love spam.
ღ I've copied more than 30 cds in a day.
I bake well. (Cheesecake anyone?)
ღ My favorite color is either white, yellow, pink, red or blue.
ღ I don't know how to shoot a gun.
ღ I am in love with love.
ღ I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
I laugh at my own jokes. (Someone has to...)
ღ I eat fast food weekly.
ღ I believe in ghosts.
ღ I am online 24/7, even as an away message.
ღ I can't sleep if there is a spider in the room.
ღ I am really ticklish.
I love white chocolate.
ღ I bite my nails.
I play video games.
ღ I'm good at remembering faces.
ღ I'm good at remembering names.
ღ I'm good at remembering dates.
ღ I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
My answers are totally honest.

Tags:

Status and memes!

  • Sep. 24th, 2008 at 10:55 PM
coming curse2
 MEME!!

I. RANDOM FACTS

1. Do you remember your first kiss?

Yes. I do.

2. What book was the last you read?
1984 by George Orwell. I won’t look at society/politics and acts of a sexual nature in the same way again. …what? It’s true!

3. What song are you listening to now and why?
Merchant of Death – Iron Man Soundtrack. Because I’m a cool geek.

4. Last CD(s) you bought/got
Kamelot - Ghost Opera, and The Black Halo by same artist.

5. Something we don’t know about you?
Ehm…I’ve been to circus school!

II. LOVE AND LUST AND STUFF

6. How many times have you been in love?
I actually think I have yet to experience to fall in love with someone. I’ve had a serious crush though, and one almost-crush.

7. Is there someone in your life that you talk to on a regular basis that you could fall in love with/crush on at present?
Yeah, actually there is someone I could’ve if it had been smarter than what it currently is.

8. What is the best (physical) thing someone of the opposite sex can do to you?
I suppose I should uphold a certain degree of decorum here…so a nibble in the shoulder/neck area is vastly popular with me

9. The way to your heart?
…through my stomach. I’m as easy as a bloke that way.

10. A fact about the way you kiss.
I’ve been known to give the lower lip a nibble

III. HONESTLY

11. How are you when drunk?
Hmm…I’m probably me in a much more hyped up version I think.

12. How do you sleep?
Usually on my side, curled up in a little ball. I swear, I only use about 15% of my total bed space.

13. Are you concerned about your weight?
I must admit to have become a tad more conscious of it as of late, but not in any unhealthy amount no.

14. Do you have any geekish traits?
Probably one too many….

15. Are you confident about the way you look?
Well, yes. I am. A minor revolution if I think about it…

IV. IF…

16. If you could get a superpower…
Teleportation! To be able to teleport myself anywhere I wanted to go in a moment, and then go right back home the same way. That would be awesome!

17. If you could kiss anyone in the world…
…damn. Actually, I won’t tell.

18. If you could get a wish…
Become good at juggling!

19. If the world ceased to exist tomorrow…
I would wish the ones I wanted to spend my time with (apart from family of course) weren’t so bloody far off.

20. If you were a guy/girl for one day…
Find out what all this “girls are complicated” stuff is about and enjoy my simpleness.




I realised I have actually been doing this LJ stuff for over two years now. I started this pointless epos on the 27th of June 2006 - the summer after I had finished upper secondary school and was preparing myself for the life of student-hood. Now I have lived in student-hood for two years, and am well into my third year. I think I quick summary is needed.
 

2006/2007
Full year of history study.
One semester World history and one semester Norwegian history.
In depth studies in Roman imperialism, outbreak of WWI, witchunting and military resistance in Norway during WWII.

2007/2008
In-depth course in Nordic history. One semester.
In depth in feudal society.
One semester science history.

2008/2009 (current project)
Full year English Language and Litterature study.
 Philosophy.
 
All in all I think I could have spent the last two years in less sensible ways, and will give myself a pat on the back even if current project has it`s moments of despair.

against the moon
So, it has been a very, very long time since I`ve had a day this mentally challenging. (Physically as well in fact, but not because I`ve been working out a lot or anything. Though I have been hauling, lifting, pulling and pushing enough for a lifetime it seems)

Today was the day me and dad, the two most crowd-hating, huge-warehouse fobians walking on two feet would brave IKEA. I am starting to wonder if the Spartan way of living might have some quite good aspects after all. We set out early in a vague attempt at at least avoiding the greater masses of people. Putting on a pair of mental blinkers we strode right towards the gigantorosaurus-sized storeroom for furniture and manouvered our way through a lethal labyrinth of shelves and more shelves and big anonymous, greyish boxes of carton. This is where the hauling, lifting, pushing and pulling bit reached almost ridiculous amounts - besides, I had to climb the damned shelves because there was no ladder around and the employee was too, well, massive for it to be entirely safe for him to do it. Go figure. Lucky for me, I am starting to become quite skilled at this climbing thing.

Anyways, we managed to get silly boxes onto even more silly trolleys that almost required a license of their own to be manouvered around and get through the pay desk and somehow - this part eludes me still - got the trolleys down to the car where more hauling, pushing and pulling was needed in order to load big, bulky and impossible boxes into car (which proved to have some impressive room). It needs to be said that me and dad showed some impressive skills at finding creative solutions as well - all of which would qualify for the "don`t try this at home" genre. Sadly though, we had to go back inside the friggin house of death because we still needed "accessories". I don`t like that word. At all. If anyone says that to me again I will shudder down the spine. It`s evil.
That bit was probably worse than playing Indiana Jones among humungous shelves, it involved so much walking around, and at this point first hints at some coronary trouble were starting to announce their arrival. It always chooses the best times. Not saying there wasnt plenty of beds to faint on, but there were plenty of witnesses too. I don`t like having bouts in front of my parents, even less around 300 complete strangers. (THIS IS SPAAARTAAAA!! *fit*. Not gonna happen)
With some skillfull willpower and tactical sitdowns whenever dad inspected something (which he did quite a lot, he`s quite concientious bless him) I kept if off however. Saying I was dead on my feet when we finally could leave the warehouse of Horror behind is an understatement though.

We had a quick pitstop at my dad`s place before venturing to a second too-huge-warehouse for more stuff (we must be into machosism, what other explanation could there possibly-friggin` be?). I think I was two seconds away from passing out among the fruit actually, the dizzy fits in the parking lot having given me fair-warning of that. It did for sure not help that I hadn`t eaten at all. Nice going Ceri, heart says. Shut up me says. Then we decide this war is just too much and for now we want to get along. and that works better if I`m allowed to stay concious. At least the bloodpump listens to reason.

Trip back home I recall little of, and now, after some food, a nap and a shower I feel marginally better. That be as long as I don`t look at the boxes behind me. You can say a lot about the pleasant/unpleasantness of IKEA, but putting the crap together will forever remain nothing but a final in Patience.

That`s it for now.
yours faithfully,

The walking Zombie (except I`m sitting right now)

PS: Autumn rocks.






Nicking memes, what fun!

  • Sep. 17th, 2008 at 6:59 AM
coindragon
Yes Joe. I`m nicking this from you. I have half an hour to kill.


THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1) Laila. Well, it is my name.
2) Ceri. Actually more or less my second name, should probably get it as a middle name actually, it weirds me out to be called Laila by English-speakers. Too used to Ceri now.
3) Hey you! Smallish person!

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1) Ceridwen
2) theceri
3)

THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1) My resiliency
2) The fact that I`m not afraid to be me even if it means making a complete doofus out of myself
3) I can see and appreciate the good things about everyone I meet

THREE THINGS YOU HATE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1) My fear of taking chances
2) How I sometimes succumb to feelings of inadequacy
3) That I`m too sensitive

THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1) Norwegian. That`s it actually
2)
3)

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1) Loneliness
2) That green stuff in the fridge that definetly will start walking on it`s own soon
3) The future

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1) Laughter
2) Music
3) Something to eat

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1) A pretty nice belt I got for a birthday once
2) Red pole socks
3) Fingergloves. Constantly used this time of year.

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE BANDS (or artists at the moment):
1) Battlelore
2) Dragonforce
3) Great Big Sea

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE SONGS AT PRESENT:
1) Captain Wedderburn - Great Big Sea
2) Lithium and A Lover - Sirenia
3) Consequence Free - Great Big Sea

THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS:
1) Climb a tree without half falling when getting back down
2) Make a solid dinner complete with dessert
3) Travel again perhaps

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP (love is a given):
1) Patience (I do need that) and common interests
2) Humour and childishness, to be able to be completely, ridiculously and impossibly immature and have fun with it
3) That he can respect and understand that sometimes I need his absence more than his presence without thinking all sorts of wrongs about the way I feel about him

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE:
1) I have not once in my life regretted the fact that I`m alive
2) I always forgive
3) Sometimes I`m horribly misantropic

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE OPPOSITE SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1) The eyes. Seriously, if there is a spark or a mischevious twinkle in there I`ve got problems. And I really like the brown kind.
2) Shoulders, I like a good shoulder to rest my head on
3) The way he walks. You have no idea how much that can say to me. Call me weird if you like.

THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:
1) Not care
2) Go for a full day without finding something to smile about
3) Keep my balance on something narrow

THREE OF YOUR FAVOURITE HOBBIES:
1) Knitting. Oh yes you read right!
2) Geeking. That be watching/listening to old heroes like Transformers or He-Man (By the Power of Greyskull!!) or play games on my computer (Like Leisure Suit Larry, WoW, old Sierra Games and so on...)
3) Reading or movie-watching

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1) Get a sense of feeling back into my hands!
2) Stop time and go back to sleep
3) Fast-forward time until I`m home again

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:
1) Teacher. I`ve been a teacher since I was 10.
2)
3)

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1) Back to England damnit
2)
3)

THREE KIDS' NAMES:
1) Maja
2) Charlie
3) Olav

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1) Fall in love. That would be nice to experience.
2) Befriend someone I don`t like
3) Touch MC Hammer just for the hell of it
wake the dead
... say hello to Mrs. Pile-of-books and Mr. Get-your-arse-in-gear-and-work!!

I started University again last week, on the menu for this semester is Introduction to English Language, British Studies and Philosophy. The philosophy course is for an exam I must have in order to get an approved BA. Otherwise you can bite your nose on me not sitting down to study philosophy. Don`t get me wrong, I don`t mind the subject, I just mind having to study it when I feel very academic, and I feel academic by looking at the pile(s) of books I have for this semester.

  

The left pile is my books for Bristish Studies. If I had chosen to take American topics this semester as well I would have gotten a similar pile (including the Norton Anthology of American Litterature) to go with that. The book at the bottom is rather easy, reminds me of my text-books from high-school. And the lecturer did confirm that it was indeed a British A-level book. I don`t mind. The other ones are certainly University-standard...
The right pile are my books for Introduction to English language. Don`t you envy me? I am not quite sure what to expect from this subject yet, for so far we have only had one survey-lecture. But at least the professor waves us goodbye with a "May the Force be with you". I am not quite sure if he was just being cool or if it was a genuine hope for us through his classes. In which case I take it as a worryingly ominious statement.

I havent yet gotten my books in philosophy, but since it is a fairly small subject with evening-lectures, I hope to get away with buying just one or two books. Not only because the two piles I have already purchased hurt my wallet, but because it hurt my back hauling them home too. I will find out since I have the first philosophy-lecture this evening. I did get through the science-history bit of those two exams, so hopefully I should manage this one as well. Even with the grammatical gnomes cackling on my shoulders. I think this semester will be quite alright, and even more alright after Christmas since I will be done with Philosophy by then and as such get a much more manageable schedule. I will also have to sit down with the councellor soon and sort out my study-points and figure out what I have, what I need to have to get what I want and what I should do ahead. I should not dread it as much as I do, but as long as I don`t know how it looks, I can at least pretend like it looks good..

Apart from that, very quiet times indeed. Am redecorating my room, right now it is empty save for my bed, and I quite like it that way. Perhaps that spartan way of living isn`t so stupid after all....

Oh, and my hair recently got an eclectic and phsycedelic upgrade.



That would be all of interesting news this end at the time however. Am starting to see the first signs of autumn here, and am of course gleeful of that fact, the mornings have also started to hold a slight chill, even if mid-day and evenings are very warm still. And my iPod is safely in my bag. No more forgetting it at home! I am too addicted to that thing...

No other way

  • Aug. 4th, 2008 at 7:54 AM
holding back the flood

I wonder if dying doing something you love is a good way to go. It really does sound like it at first, what better way to go? And shouldn`t it ease some of the loss for the people left behind? Theese thoughts have occupied me all weekend, but I can`t seem to get a fix on it. I can`t really let go of it either, it`s as if I`m afraid of going mad unless I find an answer to settle with. Theese thoughts didn`t hit me out of nowhere, of course they didn`t. I lost someone at K2 this weekend. A lot of people did. 

It`s always a danger, everyone knows that. The great mountains claims many lives every year, and the people who venture there see  the people who never came home. Their corporeal ghosts just lying where they fell because noone is able to bring them back down. It serves as a grim reminder that things doesen`t always go well. I have a friend on the way up to Everest, he`s been there for a long time and he`s not coming back. A lot of the same thoughts I have now visited me back then. It`s not so much grievance as silent contemplation. They loved what they were doing, they loved the challenge and the thrill and made every precaution. And noone knew the dangers better than they did, they knew every trip could be their last. We all knew that, but it`s not something you choose to think about.

I can`t help but wonder though, do they accept it? Somewhere in the back of their minds, fogged by exhaustion and lack of oxygen, do they know what is happening? Do they accept that they won`t be going anywhere again? Do they think their goodbyes or are they too disoriented to realise what is happening and merely sink gratefully into what they mistake as warmth, but is really the numbness you can`t be called back from? And if so, is that a last mercy? I don`t think I will ever know, not the way they know.
In the middle of the hopelessness though, somewhere in the back of your mind you have already accepted that they would have wanted it no other way. It was their life, and they would have gone back again and again, because somewhere up there they saw something beautiful that made it all worth it. If they saw it around them, in the harsh, unsmooth and rough beauty of the nature, face to face with the primal elements where everything man has done means nothing, or saw it in themselves I won`t ever know. But perhaps a bit of both. 

The fact still remains that even if they would have been too sedated by cold and exhaustion and delusion to accept death when it came, they accepted it when they started to climb and decided to chance. Skill is important, but sometimes you can do everything right and it won`t make a difference - and they all knew it and accepted it. So the rest of us find comfort in the thought that they died doing what they loved, hoping they got to see what they came to see, or got to feel the trhill they sought in standing on the top, looking down at the world. Feeling like a champion. Of course we would have wanted them to sit old, with grandkids on their knee telling them about their great adventures and inspiring them. But you won`t always get what you want.

In the end, what I decided on was that they died not only doing what they loved, they died living. And I will never forget them.

Blogging from Work

  • Jun. 19th, 2008 at 12:04 PM
Wolf
It`s very quiet inside (apart from the repeated, and rather annoying sound from the info-video running in the reseption-area) and the rain is pouring out inside. Around me coworkers are talking about everything that is not work-related, and I am alone at my own desk. In other words, the time is ripe for sneaky blogging. Have now been working for a bit over two weeks and am starting to get things into my head, and they do dare to leave me alone for longer periods of time. (They wouldn`t have done it if they knew I de-organised their felt-tip pens). Wednesdays are always hectic with theoretic examinations, the other days of the week are up and down without any real pattern.

Apart from work, this summer is gonna be very quiet I think, and probably somewhat lonely. I had to quit having contact with someone I liked a lot because it felt like wakling voluntarily up on a scaffold every time I tried to talk after a while, and the way it saddened me wasn`t going to be healthy in the long run. Especially when you suffer from a personality that causes you to be easily hurt. I may have to do the same with someone else soon, and knowing I have to do it is more or less just as sad as actually doing it.
I have no real plans or anything of the sort, but kind of hard to have when you only have weekends off. Hopefully though I can use the money I make to do something nice and fun when summer is over and not just spend it on things that won`t last as long as memories will. When I`m done working, the great autumn market won`t be far away either, that is always a special and fun event where you can find more or less everything. 

They sell hats there Joe.

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